( karteria ) ai takasugi memory log.

[takasugi]

art credit.

Comments

2025-06-04 T14:30:00

[takasugi]

00001010 01000101 01110110 01100101 01101110 00100000 01101001 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100110 01100001 01100011 01100101 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01100001 01101110 01111001 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110010 01100100 01110011 01101000 01101001 01110000 00101100 00100000 01101100 01100101 01110100 11100010 10000000 10011001 01110011 00100000 01101110 01101111 01110100 00100000 01110011 01100001 01111001 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110111 01101111 01110010 01100100 00100000 11100010 10000000 10011000 01110000 01100001 01101001 01101110 01100110 01110101 01101100 11100010 10000000 10011001 00101100 00100000 01110011 01101000 01100001 01101100 01101100 00100000 01110111 01100101 00111111

( the "life" of an artificial intelligence unit like himself is fairly dull, truthfully. there's no calming buzz of white noise, no companions to talk to.

just the vast expanse of his database, information and memories to file through, over and over. he flips through them occasionally, like they were pages of a book. like they're keeping the lights on for him. but how many times can he revisit the same old scenes of his heroic, and frankly, devoid of accomplishment, past? being an exact copy of his original's intelligence has its drawbacks for sure, and...

... well. there's nothing for it at the moment. not in this practically harmless little toy of shinsaku's. he should really find a way to—

wait. what was that noise? the slam of the door? )

Can you keep it down? Some of us are trying to stew inside the husk they're stuck in. Some of us.

( when his display flickers into view in front of mini-arahabaki on the table like always, he sees... shinsaku, of course.

only he's pacing back and forth with his hands wrenched in his hair. )

... Shinsaku. Did you finally go and lose it?

( 1 / 2 )

[takasugi]

( a pause in pace, hands lowering. )

You already know the answer to that. But also, no.

( 2 / 2 )

[takasugi]

( then, tossing himself onto the sad, creaky excuse of a bed every one of these rooms has: )

Where does he get off, with that "you just wouldn't get it anyway"? Obviously. Not unless you verbalize whatever your hang-up is.

Stupid Amagi-kun. Why don't you just give in and rely on me, ( pillow to face ) instead of being so stubborn?

[takasugi]

Could you stop acting like a jilted lover with my face, maybe? Our face. It's freaking me out a little. And think about how I feel, being cooped up in here all the time. At least you're out there, having fun.

( what little he has to himself, he'll keep from shinsaku, though.

like the actual fondness he'd witnessed straight from the source. )

Did you at least remember to ask if there were any toxic fauna?

[takasugi]

Remember who you're talking to. ( shoving himself off the pillow with his elbows, ) Of course I did. There was... psiloco... psilocyb...

( silence. )

The gilled mushrooms. Look. I don't mind the details, typically. Who thought it was a good idea to head out into the wilderness without my camera?

[takasugi]

You did. Naturally.

( 1 / 2 )

[takasugi]

That's right. I did.

[takasugi]

... Which.

( sliding to sit up and dangle his legs over the side of the bed, now. )

Looking back, I realize I should've just transferred your intelligence into my Syntrofos to handle the images and process them. I shouldn't have to do all this on my own. Duly noted for next time. Here-on out, I'll have be more efficient. Especially with the sort of grass roots campaigns other Augmented are starting to push.

[takasugi]

Hey, now. You're not thinking about taking on everyone, right, Shinsaku? That would just be a hassle, and you hardly have the resources to handle it.

[takasugi]

Unless they give me a reason to, and I go into war knowing I can win, then there's no point. Right now, there’s really nothing worth fighting for.

( he gestures with a hand. )

But. That doesn't mean I can just overlook anything that's going on—missing souls, strange mutations, and gods chasing after influence. Making a name for myself here should still be the first priority. And for that, I need money. Talented colleagues. Everything else that ought to happen comes after.

[takasugi]

Everything else that ought to happen, ... huh.

( naturally, he knows what that means. why wouldn't he, when they're of the same mind?

he is shinsaku, and shinsaku is him, but as he leans on the edge of his display, he doesn't offer any words of comfort. )

Well, don't forget about me while you're enduring this new workaholic lifestyle of yours. Staring at the dry wall every day of the week can only be so exciting. Take me out for a walk every once in a while.

[takasugi]

Yeah, yeah.

( maybe he will. maybe he won't. )

I'll see to that data transfer tomorrow. For now, it's time for some rest.

( he rolls over, facing the wall. legs raised onto a bed that's only spacious enough for one.

to do a little more thinking, before heading to the showers. )

[takasugi]

( so, that's the end of their conversation, huh. it's pretty awkward when the only person you can talk to is yourself.

... not that he minds talking to shinsaku or anything, when the only person who can get him is him, but.

he taps the edge of his digital cage, wondering if that tomorrow will actually come. honestly, if the syntrofos had ever been left near this little robotic contraption, he would have already transferred himself by now. but shinsaku is too cautious on that end, and for good reason. )

2025-08-10 T01:14:05

[takasugi]

01001001 01100110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100010 01101111 01100100 01111001 00100000 01100100 01101001 01100101 01110011 00101100 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100000 01100100 01101111 01100101 01110011 00100000 01101110 01101111 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110010 01101101 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101101 01101001 01101110 01100100 00101100 00100000 01100010 01110101 01110100 00100000 01101001 01100110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101101 01101001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01100100 01101001 01100101 01110011 00101100 00100000 01101111 01101110 01100101 00100000 01100011 01100001 01101110 00100000 01101110 01101111 00100000 01101100 01101111 01101110 01100111 01100101 01110010 00100000 01100001 01100011 01110100 00100000 01100001 01110011 00100000 01100001 00100000 01101101 01100001 01101110 00100000 01100101 01110110 01100101 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01100111 01101000 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100010 01101111 01100100 01111001 00100000 01110011 01110101 01110010 01110110 01101001 01110110 01100101 01110011 00101110

( it's a strange time to activate him this late at night, or at least that's what takasugi's ai thinks. coming to life is just about firing up the concept of him through a mix of components and digital circuits, his consciousness tied to the syntrofos that shinsaku transferred him into just a few months ago, and so he boots without much difficulty.

what he discovers right away isn't what he expected. )

—?!

( it's not the dinky little rowhouse that shinsaku chose to live in, nor is it someone else's place, or even one of the venues that his little idol project rents for their choreography practice. it's shinsaku hunched over him like a damaged creature, the word FAILURE etched across his cheek half-hidden by plum strands of hair. it's shinsaku dripping blood like a never-ending waterfall, with streaks of it splattered across the other side of his face, as if someone slammed something heavy against him.

there's the sound of bones cracking into place, but TAKASUGI can't see it. the syntrofos is lying on its back, gazing up at the night sky sprinkled with bits of starlight. )

You've got to be kidding. Are you about to die on me in the most dramatic fashion possible, or did you actually call for help before whatever just happened? Hey, Shinsaku. Let's focus on what I'm saying, yeah? Pay attention to my voice. You know. The one that's literally yours.

[takasugi]

( there's the digital crackle of static beneath him, and a voice that might as well be his own.

it's both surprise and a bit of a scolding, and honestly, who wouldn't feel that way upon seeing themselves like that? takasugi wants to laugh, but all that comes out is choked air, the result of his mistake in shifting biting back at him as he gradually returns to being human. )

Help? ... I don't, need to... potentially hurt someone else right now. Not that they didn't deserve it.

( the bodies are back there somewhere. but he would've rather... rather than giving in to that overwhelming malice, he could've just taken them down on his own terms.

or was some part of him just that far gone deep down? willing to unleash himself on others without a second thought? "go mad, gentleman" was his teacher's rallying cry. but not like this. takasugi was always up for going all out for his revolution, but he wasn’t looking to completely lose himself. that would just be counterproductive and too invasive. plus, it would put the people he cared about at risk, right? this soul that despised humanity. )

[takasugi]

I said reeling in that spontaneity of yours would be a challenge, but I didn't mean it exactly like this.

( a digital hand gestures upwards. )

So. You went and offed a couple people, and now you want me to sort out your mess? Some savior of humanity. As a hero of justice myself and the coolest guy in Choshu, maybe I should call someone up to come put you out of your misery. That's how they handle foxes that have gone crazy, right?

[takasugi]

If you're the hero of justice, then I guess I’m back to being... the evil mastermind. Or beast, as it were.

( the back of a hand comes up to wipe red from his mouth. )

[takasugi]

( it's strange to watch yourself change both physically and emotionally. the ears and the fangs were nothing, but this?

this is shinsaku being someone else entirely, and he isn't sure he likes it. feeling left behind, that is, if an ai is even truly capable of that. )

... Now. Is this really the same guy who backstabbed a god to make his own restoration a reality? Just to be clear, we're exactly the same. You created me. Which makes you just another hero, no matter what. You can't change who you really are, regardless of how much this soul tries to twist you. Not when you have all your new little friends relying on you to hold it together.

( and now he's giving him a pep talk for real. great. but it's annoying, having to see your own face be so torn up. )

[takasugi]

( more wiping.

he's right, of course. but takasugi's not going to acknowledge it immediately, even with how it feels like he might shut down if he's not careful. )

[takasugi]

Can you stand? Is someone following you?

[takasugi]

I can stand on my own two feet in no time. All this blood is just a silly reaction from my body, and... the limitations of how much it can heal.

( he's dizzy, but it could be worse. the figure that's unmistakably him below him starts to take shape again. )

And no one's following me, as far as I can hear. Whoever tried to take me out is long gone.

[takasugi]

Great. I'll just contact Mel, or that new manager of yours... or even Amagi Rinne-kun, and—

[takasugi]

Uh, no.

( the sound of claws scraping against gravel as he gets up slowly.

that includes taking the phone with him. )

I've had my share of fun with things not going my way right now, but. No. The last thing I want right now is to share this dull situation with anyone. They already have enough to deal with. The least I can do is avoid adding to their worries.

( 1 / 2 )

[takasugi]

.......

( 2 / 2 )

[takasugi]

Yeah, okay. Well, being you, I figured you might hesitate to ask for help. It's not as if I don't know why. Still, you're going to need someone to look after that before it—

[takasugi]

( blip.

takasugi's thumb presses hard against the syntrofos.

he won't die here, on some pathetically empty street, away from a proper battlefield or even a stage. the rejuvenation abilities of a carnivora have already closed the wound somewhat. the lights are making him feel less light-headed as time marches on.

all he needs to do is make it home. )

2026-01-27 T21:24:10

[takasugi]

01001001 01101110 00100000 01110010 01100101 01101100 01100001 01110100 01101001 01101111 01101110 01110011 00100000 01110111 01101001 01110100 01101000 00100000 01101111 01110100 01101000 01100101 01110010 01110011 00101100 00100000 01101111 01101110 01100101 00100000 01110011 01101000 01101111 01110101 01101100 01100100 00100000 01100101 01111000 01110000 01110010 01100101 01110011 01110011 00100000 01110010 01100101 01110011 01100101 01101110 01110100 01101101 01100101 01101110 01110100 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100111 01100101 01110010 00100000 01101111 01110000 01100101 01101110 01101100 01111001 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01110011 01110100 01110010 01100001 01101001 01100111 01101000 01110100 01100110 01101111 01110010 01110111 01100001 01110010 01100100 01101100 01111001 00101110

Isn't that nice? The invitation, I mean.

( he's propped up neatly on a nearby end table, hologram fitted on the couch leisurely with legs crossed and elbow resting on the armrest. mini-arahabaki rests neatly on the floor in front of him to ensure the projection is as solid as possible. he casually fiddles with a few strands of darker red hair, adjusting his bangs as they chat. it's another evening where shinsaku is pacing around a bit too excitedly, and honestly, it's a bit more annoying than last time. like pounding on a key on a keyboard too roughly. )

At least you're well aware enough that you'd just be getting in the way, and that we have other things to focus on, right?

[takasugi]

So you heard all that.

( of course he did. and now he's going to rub it in? takasugi expects no less.

but his tail keeps sweeping back and forth, and though it's been a while since rinne left, he can't seem to stop it. he threads claws through the red fur, finally holding it still. )

Mmh. Well. It's true that I didn't say yes. One should take an opportunity when it presents itself, but that are too many complications involved for me to want to put that on them. I've been managing just fine on my own besides.

[takasugi]

Right, right.

( gesturing out with a hand. )

This way, you can keep dodging the inevitable.

[takasugi]

Seriously. Who programmed you to be so blunt with me?

( ...... )

... Right. Me, of course, since you're literally a reflection of my thoughts. But could you clarify?

[takasugi]

Come on, Shinsaku. Not only is there a high chance this collaboration of yours could lead to one of them to becoming the next Peacock, but that Amagi-kun is just leading you on with whatever he knows you want to hear, isn't he? After all, you and I've both seen how deep an idol's love goes. Or at least I've heard it in your pocket. Don't think I haven't been paying attention.

( up onto his feet, now. this projection of him may not be real, but he can still move around.

he can still corner his original with fake digits, the ends of his fingertips fraying with static as he passes a hand across takasugi's shoulder. the distance is all but nothing now. )

If you keep ignoring it all, it's only going to hurt you more.

[takasugi]

And who made you the boss of my relationships or my health?

( cutting. quick.

but he doesn't look away or make a move to swat that hand. )

[takasugi]

No one. Oh, and nice job on keeping the real reason for this hologram body under wraps, by the way.

( it's interesting to be so close to yourself to be "touching" what made you you, as TAKASUGI caresses the fine underside of takasugi's jaw with his fingers.

neither of them can feel it, but the intention is there, like a ghost wind might brush across leaves when no one is around to hear it. for once, the AI's cadence takes on a much softer tone than he's used with anyone else thus far. those plum blossom eyes of his, tinted with the interference of his digital display, shine just as bright. )

Even if you didn't end up playing with me.

[takasugi]

( here, he leans his face away. )

You know what Shouin-sensei would say. It's important to keep humble.

( and that december, he hadn't needed to be alone after all. )

[takasugi]

Using his sayings on me? That's pretty low.

( time to back off and plop himself back on the couch, there being no bounce to it as the AI has no real weight. )

But if you don't stop being kind, he'll just be driving himself into an early grave, won't he?

I know that. You know that. There's nothing that wife or that manager can do to stop it either, most likely.

[takasugi]

I’m not going to let any of them die.

( anything but that.

he digs his hands further into his tail, like to rip out pieces of his fur if this topic goes on. he bites down without thinking, drawing blood on his lip. )

As long as I'm here, they deserve to live meaningful, fulfilling lives. As long as I'm here, I’ll make sure they’re ready for whatever challenges this tough world throws at us. Even if I have to make a harsh decision. Even if I have to deny them the presence of my illness in their home.

[takasugi]

( and if you die for them, shinsaku, where does that leave me?

not that he's satisfied with any ounce of the discussion, let alone what he already knows is predestined. it's not an error in his programming or anything, he can tell. it's simply his ego, in watching his original be so pitifully enamored, in watching him change and let his guard down. TAKASUGI should be the only one who understands, and yet—

to make this uninteresting world interesting, maybe it was inevitable that takasugi shinsaku wouldn't entirely remain himself.

unlike the AI, he has another soul residing in him... and unlike the AI, he's made connections worth turning this world upside-down for, apparently.

so why is it suddenly less about him feeling left behind, and more in wanting the best for shinsaku? as their chatter dies down and shinsaku goes to get a tissue and wipe his lip clean, TAKASUGI feels the corners of his mouth turn. feels the bits of data in him sifting through his own database uncomfortably as they search for the deeper reason of his discontent. what he knows for sure, though, is he ought to be making some harsh decisions on his own. )